Happy new year darlings, i welcome you into the year 2017, the year 2016 was a bright one for me, God has been faithful so much he has already done and so much he is yet doing, i’m thankful for everyone who reads this blog, I’m not as devout as i would love to but then you’ve stayed through my non-devout moments and for that i am thankful, i can only pray that this year runs smooth for you and yours.
So to kick start this year i want to share something I’m running with this year, no i do not have a list of resolutions but then this really is something that i know we all need to know;
“The hands that feed you is the hand that will ultimately control you”
FEEDING here doesn’t refer basically to physical food, it also refers to spiritual food, and emotional food, sexual food (for the married) and every other way hunger exist.
So i like to share a bit of my story every now and then, in relation to emotional feeding, So a season in my life i was insecure about a lot of things and especially those things i felt had fractured me in some way (my health, my big eyes, my previously lanky frame e.t.c) and then i met someone and then he started to help feed my insecurities, he’d call once in a while to tell me i was pretty, he knew how to make a person feel real good, and his hugs, oh my wow! His hugs were out of this world (allow me to be be carnal for a minute) he basically just whispered sweet empty nonsense’s (of course then it wasn’t nonsense) to me and i noticed something as our relationship (read situationship) continued i started to make certain insane sacrifices, there were moments all i wanted to do was sleep he’d call and i’d legit jump out of my bed and go to wherever he was not minding the distance i couldn’t afford to offend the one responsible for my daily dose of self esteem, he had me under his control full time, there were certain things i did I’m not even proud of, if i offended him i could grovel on my knees and beg till he said it was fine, now from this explanation you’d probably think he spent a lot of time with me? No he did not but like a thirsty dog I’d lap at every single 5 minutes he spared me. Until one day i decided i never wanted to feel like i did, he fed my insecurity and then owned me by feeding me, i was miserable, i was controlled, then it hit me that i had given the role of God to a man, its Gods duty to feed self esteem (not insecurity) and help you be better, because God is the only one who should control your life.
Be careful with handouts this year and where you source your income from, the hand that pays you will control you, i make dresses and my clients pay me, so long as they pay me they dictate what i would make for them and give timelines as to when they want their clothes by and in a way that controls me because i have to factor sewing time into my regular time. Be careful where you feed from financially they will control your life. Oh that reminds me, if you’re on twitter you possibly saw a picture that was viral on Sunday the 8th, it was a picture of a man who had two ladies with a leash with chains attached fixed to their necks and they held umbrellas over him, i heard he’d pay them for humiliating them in such a manner, so well since they feed off him, he has control over them to the extent of treating them like dogs. Be careful where you feed from financially.
Be careful where you feed from spiritually, this cannot be over emphasised, i see people do all sorts in the name of “my church said” or “my pastor said”, not every church is your church, not every pastor is your pastor, stop the whoredom this year, moving churches and displaying confused attributes, this is Nigeria where we take our pastors as mini God’s and their words are law. Be careful what church you attend, i would never tell you what church to attend and i would hardly be found promoting one church or stuff and its not because i don’t have a fixed church its because i try my best to feed from the lord, i cannot come and collect spiritual food that would upset my system and then produce spiritual allergies (nah I don’t want). Pick a church that feeds your spirit with the right things, don’t pick the popular church, be careful the men of “God” you place yourself under, with so much going on around you cannot afford to take off your spiritual shades and enter church anyhow, there are churches where members aren’t allowed to take drugs if they are sick, its either the lord heals you or takes you home, i cannot go there because i know God has me here for a reason (routine drugs and all), if i attend such a place i’d probably be no more by now (considering I’ve even had 5 surgeries would they have allowed me?). i don’t want to get started on my experiences with churches and stuff, i’ve made my fair share of errors and this year i’m being intentional as far as that goes, that a pastor says it doesn’t mean i would do it.
Many single and even marred have stayed in abusive relationships because of good sex, many times people just say this person should leave that person alone, he abuses her physically or emotionally or some other way, but baby you have no idea how good sex can destroy a life and a destiny. If you are single now you’d only do so right by yourself to avoid sex because you could be controlled until you marry a mad man with good sexual prowess. I cannot speak for the married tho.
Well that sums it up, for me this year i’m going to be super careful, no more feeding from random hands, i will let the lord feed me emotionally, i will be careful the people i work for and the people who give money to me, i wouldn’t go to churches anyhow, and i will pray for my husband (its never too early to pray for him btw) that he will be a man totally controlled by the lord that when he when he comes and begin to feed me emotionally (yes he will, he of course would not be my source, God is my source, but there would be a measure he will have to feed me), and also feeds sexually he would not control me to destruct but together our love will serve the almighty, and by our feeding one another God would be glorified.